A Day In the Life of a Model #8…Making Out with the Invisible Man!

So, I headed off on a beautiful sunny day to my casting, and sat inside a the dingy bit of Spring Studios.

Spring Studios is the fanciest of studios, where the top photographers and companies like to shoot. When one goes there on a casting, one passes room after room with famous photographers names on it. One then passes through the ‘fabulous’ bar, where fancypants people drink flat whites and mojitos and discuss mood boards/other people’s latest botox disasters.

Then, one descends a flight of wonky stairs and sits in a fairly dark and manky waiting room, while waiters bring plates of steaming chips to the client and models sniff the air like a hopeful dog in Greece.

I wrote my name on the list, number 52, quickly scanning the names to check out the competition. Much to my pleasant surprise, I saw mainly men’s names and one or two female’s names. That meant

a) I’d at least be spending my casting waiting time looking at male models’ faces and

b) I had less competition as the inevitable ‘bit of fluff’ that the list suggested my role was to be.

I sat for half an hour looking at male models look at their phones for 2 minutes, growing bored, and getting my book ‘How to Build a Girl’ by Caitlin Moran, which is AMAZING (I stayed up until 2am yesterday to finish it).

I was called in.

“Hello!” I said, to a room of people looking at their laptops.

“Hi, what’s your name?” they asked the laptop.

“Rebecca.”

“Aaaah! Rebecca!” They said, looking up and smiling. Improvement.

“Yes.”

“Has that male model left? It’d be great to have him in here.”

“I shall run and fetch him!” I cried, gallantly running after him and hoping it made me look good and helpful. He was walking back towards the room anyway, as he’d left his earphones.

We went back into the room.

“Right, Rebecca! We want you to recreate this image,” they pointed at a couple in bed, laughing. “We’ll film you – just pretend you’re in bed, it’s affectionate and fun. You’re wildly in love. Go!”

With modelling, you have 2 choices. Freeze, feel weird and embarrassed and do it half-heartedly, or make out with the male model you don’t know and act like he’s your long term boyfriend. I went with the latter.

A little tip here: get a little conversation going with the guy first. It makes it look like you have chemistry, and it relaxes things before you embark on making it.

They seemed pretty happy, so the male model was dismissed.

“Right Rebecca. We basically want the same thing, but just you on your own.”

So I was to make out with the invisible man? Whilst standing up, pretending to be lying down in bed?

Yes.

I wrapped my hands around his imaginary neck, kissed his imaginary face and stroked his imaginary cheek. I giggled at his imaginary joke, tickled his imaginary tummy and looked outraged at his imaginary joke.

“That’s the best one yet!” The client exclaimed with a smile.

I felt pretty confident about this job!

“Well, I had a lot of experience making out with imaginary boyfriends when I was 12!” I replied, with a smile.

I saw my chances of booking the job plummet within a second.

Rebecca x

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